I don't know why... but recently I just alternate between apathy and this crushing loneliness that sometimes just gets a little too difficult.

It's ok to be alone, but it's not ok to feel alone... this devastating realization of waking up, standing in the dark and wondering where everyone went.

The more I talk about things, the more alone I feel and the more my grasp on reality seems to be slipping.

It seems almost... too much to bear sometimes... suppress suppress suppress...

I want to be around people... and yet part of me can't stand it...

I think I just need to retreat... back into my shell for a bit... and let the world pass me by. With time, all things will get better hopefully.